just turned 14 when it happened. I knew I was a lesbian, but I grew up in a conservative household which made me want to not be one. I wanted to make my parents proud by having a boyfriend, so I picked a random male classmate and started dating him. At first it made me proud because I was finally “normal” and I could finally “relate” to straight girls. But because this guy was my boyfriend, he wanted to kiss me, and I didn’t want it for obvious reasons. So he forced me multiple times, at first, not violently, he was trying to manipulate me with sweet eyes, and I always ended up agreeing to make him happy, but nothing ever grossed me out like this grossed me out. And this happened all the time, every time we were together and he wanted to kiss me, and he wanted to kiss me a lot. “Luckily” during those moments, there was always my friends with me, this was the reason why he wasn’t violent. But at one moment, we ended up to be together, just the two of us, and he wanted to kiss me again. I was trying to find all sorts of excuses like “i’m sick” but it didn’t work. So he pushed me to the wall and started kissing me with his tongue, and now i’m 17 and i can’t get these moments out of my head…