When I was 14 and dated my first girlfriend, a male friend sexually harassed me because he was fetishizing us. He provoked our breakup and made me have sex with him. I was totally confused about my desires and boundaries. After that, I lived through years of heterosexuality and others sexual and domestic violences. It took me almost ten years and meeting radical feminism and other radfem lesbians to be able to consider myself as a lesbian and to exclude men from my intimate life.